Nash
Loud beeping drags me from that dimly lit basement on the south side of Chicago. It’s dark, and next to me, Raelynn groans.
“That’s Ry.” She reaches for the bedside light. “Cover your eyes, darlin’.”
I don’t have to. I’m already lying on my stomach, my face buried in the pillow, and can only manage a, “Mmmfffmm.”
“Shit.” She draws out the word, always two syllables, and her comforting weight next to me disappears. “We’ve got a job.”
Sleep vanishes in an instant. Sitting up, I scrub my hands over my face. “What is it?”
Raelynn cups my jaw, skating her thumb along my cheek. “This ain’t gonna be easy, Nash, but…I can’t tell you. Ry’s rules. It’s safer for everyone that way.” Her lips brush mine, almost hesitantly. Like she’s afraid I’ll be angry—or afraid. I’m neither. Not after her entire team came to rescue me.
“Do you know how long you’ll be?”
The closet door slides open, and she shoves the clothes aside so she can press her finger to the lock on the safe. Her skimpy tank top rides up as she reaches for the black rucksack on the top shelf, exposing the creamy skin at her waist.
“No. Not even sure what part of the world we’re goin’ to. All I know is it’s a payin’ job.”
“Huh? What does that mean?” Pulling on my jeans, I give Kiki a scritch. The cat sleeps at the foot of our bed every night now, and he’s confused why we’re up and moving around at 4:00 a.m. This should be prime sleeping time.
“Means no one from Hidden Agenda’s in trouble.” The rucksack lands on the bed, and she winds her arms around my waist. “We got lucky for a while. After the shit that went down with Ry and Wren, plus the baby…we all caught a nice, long break. But now that things are gettin’ back to normal…this is gonna happen more often. And we never talked about it.”
“I know what your job is, sweetness. I would never ask you to give it up.” Worry hikes her shoulders up close to her ears, and she holds my gaze with such need, it’s like she’s afraid I’m going to disappear.
Her voice drops to a whisper. “Every time I get on that plane, Nash, there’s a chance I won’t come home.”
I yank her against me, my embrace so fierce, I should be worried about crushing her, but I can’t make myself let her go. “If you hadn’t gotten on that plane two months ago, I wouldn’t have come home.” My eyes burn. This is the woman I fell in love with. And without the men and women she works with, without their commitment to help those who need it, I’d be dead. Along with my father.
Releasing her, I take her hand and lead her back to the bed so I can sit and pull her into my lap. “I hate the idea of you in danger. If I didn’t know Ryker and West—and everyone else you work with—maybe we’d be having a very different conversation right now. But you’re the one who told me Hidden Agenda is the best. You took down a whole government, Raelynn.”
“That wasn’t me—“
“I know. But it was still your team. I won’t lie to you. I’m probably not going to sleep much until you’re home. And I’ll worry. Every minute. But so will everyone else staying behind.”
She offers me a small smile. “Q worries the most. Though if Wyatt ever goes on mission with us, I expect Hope will give him a run for his money.”
“I have to stop by Graham and Q’s place later today. They want some built-ins for their closet. I’ll check on him.”
“You’re really okay with this?” The wonder in her tone gives me pause.
Am I?
No. I’ll never be okay with the woman I love putting herself in danger. But that doesn’t mean I have any right to ask her to give up something she so obviously needs—and wants—to do.
“If I could keep you safe every day for the rest of our lives, I would. There isn’t a damn thing I won’t do to protect you, Raelynn. Except stop you from doing what you love.” Staring into her bright blue eyes, I try to convey exactly how much she means to me. “You are my everything. You saved me. But more than that, you gave me a home. Here.” I rest my palm over her heart. “Ryker called because someone else needs your help to get back to their home. How could I ever say no to that?”
Raelynn seals her lips to mine. The kiss is anything but gentle. My entire body comes alive, and if her phone didn’t beep again, I’d beg her for ten more minutes. Long enough for me to show her how much I need her.
“We’re wheels up in an hour, but I gotta help pack up at the warehouse,” she says, breathless as she gets to her feet. Under her tank top, her nipples have hardened to tight nubs, and her chest is flushed pink. “As soon as it’s safe, I’ll text you and let you know when I’ll be home. Keep the security system armed at all times.”
“No answering the door to strangers, keep my phone charged and within reach at all times, and don’t be afraid to use the panic button. I know.”
After DeLuca’s men took me and tortured Raelynn in our living room, Ryker insisted we get the best security system on the market—which happened to be designed by West’s wife, Cam. Then lectured me for an hour on proper safety protocols.
“Ry’s stayin’ in Seattle for this one,” Raelynn says as she zips up her rucksack and reaches for a pair of black pants. “If anythin’ happens, if you even think you’re bein’ followed, or see someone suspicious in the neighborhood…”
“I’ll call him. I promise.”
At the front door, we say goodbye with a long, passionate kiss that leaves me hard as a rock. I watch through the window as she backs out of the driveway, then turn to Kiki. “Well, I’m not going back to sleep. Want some breakfast?”
The cat follows me into the kitchen, sticking close and winding around my legs as I start the coffee pot. “I’m worried too, little guy. But she knows what she’s doing. It’ll all be okay.”